Flakes of Snow
by Lazerwolf314
Summary: Christmas spirit is hard to come by this year for Penelope as she suffers through a blow that cripples her belief in joy. All she wants is her hope back for Christmas.
1. Chapter 1

_This was written for the Christmas gift exchange over on Chit Chat on Author's Corner and I wish a very merry Christmas to __**KricketWilliams**__. She suggested the following prompts: the song __**The Christmas Waltz**__; the movie __**"It's A Wonderful Life"**__; __**colorful poinsettias**__ and __**snow**__. I hope you and everyone else enjoy!_

_This should be about three or four chapters long; something undecided as of yet._

_Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Criminal Minds._

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><p>Already the Christmas spirit was emerging, winding itself through the very air like a drug. Lights and decorations were going up, malls were filling, toys and gifts were flying from the shelves, children looked with wide eyes into each store they passed and trees were being fetched for households. Families were coming together, reuniting in some cases, parting in others. Festive momentums found themselves on display in store windows, dining rooms and all manner of places. The joy and cheer was infectious and Penelope Garcia found herself just as excited as the rest of the world.<p>

Already, her apartment was decked from floor to ceiling in as many colorful arrangements as could fit, a tiny artificial tree made itself comfortable in the corner and happy little snowmen and reindeer ornaments were scattered amongst the rest of her dolls and decorations. This year was especially bright for her because a miracle had been bestowed on them. Her best friend had returned from the dead and Garcia was not going to waste any time that she had been given.

However, her Christmas shopping was not going as well as usual. For some reason, she simply could not find herself getting into the mood needed to find the perfect gifts. She had always had a knack to spot those little things that would be ideal for each individual. But it simply was not working this year. She had been in the mall for over three hours and she had only managed to pick up a small Lego set for Jack. Frustration was beginning to burn.

Light music played around the mall, the gentle notes of 'A Christmas Waltz' gradually becoming identifiable. Despite the simmering discontentment that had become her constant companion on this trip, Garcia found herself smiling. So many memories were attached to that song, all the way from her childhood. But her favorite was from two years ago.

"_May I have this dance Penelope?" A soft voice and a dark hand were extended, causing Garcia to look up from the bowl of salad she was trying to put together. Her chocolate god grinned at her, eyes sparkling with mirth as he watched her._

"_Why, I think I may." With a small laugh, she took a step forward and, reaching around Derek, turned up the radio, letting the sounds of the waltz fill the room. Leaving the mess that had become her kitchen hours ago, she allowed him to lead her into the living room. Not caring that their friends would be there in a matter of moments and that the turkey still wasn't done, she let herself follow his direction as they spun around the room._

"_Thank you for helping with this." She murmured as they continued to flow across the floor._

"_No problem baby girl." He told her, his chin resting lightly on the top of her head for a second. Then they were back to dancing, the song slowly drawing to a halt. When it was finished, they halted; breathing lightly and Garcia felt a rush of happiness well. She looked up at Derek and he down at her and their eyes met. They stood like that for a moment._

_Then the bell rang and the spell was broken. But there was no loss._

She still cherished that memory. The screaming of distraught child snapped her from the recollection and with a sigh of loss, she resumed her shopping. Still with the song playing in her mind, she found that searching through the stores wasn't as hard as it had been before. Slowly, some of her Christmas joy that had been abandoned at the door drifted back to her, leaving her feeling content and accomplished.

Her cell phone rang. Idly wondering who would be calling; everyone knew she had the day off (not that that meant much when working for the BAU), she glanced at the display. And her good mood evaporated.

Giving serious consideration to not answering, she stared at the bright pink phone in her hand with what could only be called repulsion. But on the final ring, she flipped it open against her better judgement.

"Kevin."

"Penelope! Thank you so much for answering! Can we talk?" his voice was excited and nervous. Her nose wrinkled.

"There's not much to talk about," she snapped.

"Please, hear me out," Kevin pleaded. Taking her silence as a sign to continue, he rushed on. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. You have to believe that. All I want is you."

Disgust had her eyes narrowing and bright red and green nails tapping fiercely on the display she stood next to. "I'm sure you do. As well as another woman. Leave me alone."

"Pen, wait! Can I see you sometime? It's almost Christmas and I want you. Please."

She hung up and fumed. Bit by bit, the rage filtered away, leaving her exhausted and on the verge of tears. She did not want to deal with this; she didn't even want to think of the man who she once trusted and been betrayed by.

Saddened, she picked up her bags, once again reminded that she had barely made a dent in her list, and left the mall, unable to cope with the bright cheer that shone from every window. With that one call, all the Christmas spirit she had managed to obtain while listening to the Christmas Waltz, a song that always made her brighter, was sucked away.

She wondered if she would be able to get it back by Christmas.

Outside, a lone snowflake drifted to the ground.


	2. Chapter 2

_Agh, two days until Christmas! Where the heck has the time gone? I've noticed that I'm about a chapter behind where I wanted to be on this (Sorry!), so just think of chapters that might end up after the 25th as extra presents._

_My sincere apologies to Kricket for the delay._

_Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Criminal Minds._

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><p>The sky was an ominous grey the next morning. It loomed overhead like a pregnant beast, blotting out the sunlight and forming a choking fist over the city. The solid mass signaled the inevitable arrival of snow that would invariably strangle the streets and leave people stranded. It suited Penelope's mood to the letter.<p>

She made it into the BAU only a few short minutes before shift, a flurry of cold wind with reaching fingers trailing after her. She shivered, grateful for the warmth as she headed to the bank of elevators and stepped in.

Noting the dull movements throughout the bullpen, signaling that nothing imminent had arose, Garcia made her way rapidly towards her inner sanctum, seeking some form of refuge. As she entered, she didn't bother flicking on the Christmas lights strung above her screens, unavoidably making her mood reflected on her office. She shot a look towards the little tree in the corner and saw it appeared rather dejected and lonely without its bright string of lights illuminated. Not wanting to see the sad little triangle in her vision all day, she gently pushed it into the opposite corner where, if her mojo did return, it would still sparkle.

Then she sat and powered up her babies.

The thrum gave her a small smile and she tapped her fluffy pen against the desk like a conductor. Although, she wasn't quite on the top her game, she always felt happier in her office, surrounded by the very things she was the master of. Glancing of her office one more time, she stood and clicked a few keys, sending the children into rest mode.

But before she could stand and head to the briefing room, there was a soft knock at the still ajar door. Spinning in her chair, she peered at Morgan even as he looked around her room. She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"Why aren't your lights on baby girl?" he asked gently, dark eyes finally turning to meet hers.

Biting her lip, she wished, just for a moment, Kevin was dead. Then, scolding herself for such thoughts (although, frankly, they were pleasant) she replied, "I'm not in the mood for them."

Confusion flickered across his face and he frowned. "Why not? You're one of the most joyful people I know. Are you okay?" the genuine concern touched her heart and she felt a tug of shame for worrying him. He always worried.

"It's just… been a rocky start to the holidays," she finally admonished.

"Tell me what happened." He stated calmly, making his way further into her dark sanctum and seating himself at the extra chair that rarely ever saw any use. His tone held no room for argument and, deep down, she was grateful.

"I left Kevin," she mumbled, the still-fresh wound sparking. Despite having adapted a thin wall of cool indifference towards the man, the memory of what he had done was stronger than her will to fight it off.

Saying nothing, Derek simply closed the space between them and pulled her into his strong arms. And Garcia found herself crying softly, the simple gesture shattering her defenses.

"Walked in on him and another woman," her words were muffled against his shirt.

"Oh baby girl, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. He was a jerk."

"I know you. Don't lie to me Penelope," his voice was soothing and yet she could hear the ferocity underneath. It made her shiver.

For some absurd reason, it reminded her of the Christmas when she had been seventeen.

_"Common P; don't worry. Everything will be fine," Joey watched her with reassuring eyes, his mouth quirking into a sarcastic grin._

_Balling her hands together in nervousness, Garcia glanced once again at her house, brilliantly lit with all manner of Christmas lights that she hadn't even known they had. "You don't know my dad," she mumbled._

_Joey leaned across the car seat and stopped his face inches from hers. The witty look was gone, replaced by seriousness rare in a teen of their age. "P, trust me." His tone was low and gentle, but the glint in his features spoke louder than his words._

_Slightly taken aback by the sudden determination in her normally easy going boyfriend, Penelope just nodded, blinking in astonishment. Then the grin returned and an air of ease filled the cab of his car once again._

_Turning away, Joey fumbled briefly with the latch of his door, which had been giving him trouble for quite some time but, because he was the oddball of the community who didn't notice things even if they were right in front of him, he had never gotten around to fixing it. He hopped out and landed in a light padding of snow, which sent flurries rocketing into the air, before racing around to her side and graciously opening the door for her. Giggling slightly by the show of chivalry, she took his extended hand and jumped out._

_Hand in hand, they walked in silence up the steps of her porch and, with one last look, she gently pushed open the door. The first thing she saw was her mother and father, laughing uproariously at their little brown dachshund covered head to paw with tinsel as he cowered under the colorful poinsettia next to the tree. At the sight of his favorite master, the tiny pup raced over and hid itself behind her legs. A choked snicker echoed from beside her, a mirror to what she held inside._

_The dog wined piteously, so she released Joey's hand and picked him up. He wriggled slightly and licked her face, glad to be away from the older ones that laughed. Turning her eyes towards her parents, she noted that the laughing had stopped and her father was now studying Joey intently. Stepping forward with the pup still in her arms, Penelope intervened._

_"Mom, Dad, this is Joey. Joey, these arm my parents."_

_Sliding on the charm, he extended a hand with a warm smile. "Nice to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Garcia."_

_Her father simply regarded the two in silence for a long moment before her mother prodded him in the side. With a sidewise glance at her daughter, Mrs. Garcia walked over and shook hands with Joey. Seconds later, and much to everyone's surprise, Mr. Garcia followed._

_Then he looked down at his daughter and said, "Pen, I like this one. Keep him around."_

Pulled back into the present by the arms still around her, Garcia found herself nodding. "Alright. He hurt me. I accept that. But it's Christmas and I don't know if I can be cheerful." With her admission done, she dropped her head once again to his chest.


End file.
